I’m looking through my pictures
again—as you inevitably do—and I just got stuck on one. I’m on a beach in Goa,
spinning and singing and finally happy after a horrendous day. As I kept gazing
at this picture, suddenly I saw what was written in the sand: “Forgiveness.”
The flowers I started planting a
few days ago are already beginning to sprout, the beautiful green uncurling,
proudly showing off its first two leaves.
I see the dead things in me coming
to life again.
And soil—or hearts—that have been
poisoned by the mess that life creates can only come clean through forgiveness.
That, I think, is why forgiveness is emphasized so often in the Word of God,
His true words to us: “For if you forgive other people when they sin against
you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive
others their sin, I will not forgive your sins.” He lets it be known: ‘I cannot
give you the life you have imagined with me—or even any sort of healthy life at
all—without this cleansing balm of forgiveness.’
He sees such beauty in us,
masterpieces, things perfectly planned and gloriously carved out in our souls
as we have let Him do His work: we are as majestic to Him as the waterfalls I
witnessed cascading down from great heights yesterday, something about us that
is irreplaceable and forever precious to Him, the work He loves to gaze on and
just can’t get enough of. And we botch it: we try to make our own way, carve
our own paths and find ourselves stuck, not able to cascade at all. But He
gently guides, does surgery and soon, we are a green plant again, forever
unfurling.
Loss happens. The seed had to let
go to find that new growth. It is a wholehearted pursuit to become a green
plant, a forever letting of what was before to find the new. One cannot happen
without the other, so…we let go.
I am the girl who gets to dance
upon forgiveness. My wholehearted approach to life has lead to hurt but my
Savior is enough. I find the balance of my heart comes and is drawn together as
I look to Him for that beautiful resurrection (I just keep getting caught in
it, how good it is) and I am singing again. I will be dancing soon and it is
because I believe in and live out of this beauty that my Savior taught me:
forgive.
Let the wounds close. Let the
arrows go. Don’t hold on to anything—it will poison you and keep you unable to
do my work. Let it go, let them go and your life moves forward: you are free.
Did I say it was easy? No! Does a
seed know what is coming when it feels life erupting within and has to split,
crack, let itself be forced into something new, something no one ever helped it
plan for? It has to relinquish control and allow what is coming to break it
wide open and as it dies…there…comes…life…
And so He does in me. And so He
does in you. Let us be the ones who dance upon forgiveness, enthralled by it,
no matter what the breaking may cost us.
You were made for life.
Here's that picture:
No comments:
Post a Comment