#newreality

I am writing this from a new reality.

No, I haven’t found the gap in space/time and pushed through it (ahha). Rather, the old has fallen away and a new season comes to take its place.

And believe me, I have been waiting, I have been praying, I have been longing for this season when He and I get to move forward together into all that He has taken those months of waiting and praying and hoping to prepare. Ask me what it looks like and I’ll tell you that I have no clue. But I also have peace and assurance, because this Lord who I have given my life to is good, undoubtedly, overwhelmingly good. And I know what He has been doing in me and causing to come out of me and it is good. And I know that this season will be different and so good from all the rest and able to move me further because I have a secret, a new one which launches me forth into more life and possibility (a new reality!) than any other. Want to hear it? Want to know the hope that changes the whole world (me included)? Here it is: I have died.

See, I always tried to do ministry out of self-striving, my own strength, my abilities and I failed pretty regularly, probably daily if I’m being honest. There was nothing filling me up besides myself and that, I tell you, is not enough to change the world. It’s not even enough to change me or be enough for me. More than anything, my claimed ‘self-sufficiency’ held me back from everything I longed to be.

And I write this not because I finally have it all figured out (God is definitely still at work peeling back the layers in the onion-heart of me) or that it all suddenly clicked in the last day or so, but because I feel that all I have been learning about letting who I am and my works go and stepping into obedience to Him and following where He leads are finally locking together and giving me wings—all the moving parts coming together organically to launch me into who-knows-what with absolute hope.

Because when I start flying now (as Robins are made to do) His wind will be under my wings.

Because the joy that fills in and flows over me as I get ready to launch is pretty fantastic and only to be shared.

Because this journey of becoming One of His Own is not just my own—I believe there are thousands of us out there, just on the verge of being launched.

That the Lord is birthing forth dreamers, doers, Kingdom Advancers in only the beginning of a Great Awakening that will astonish all those who witness.

Because we’re no longer here for us, or what can even be done in us, but for Him and that simple, tiny mindset change releases the Lord and His Word in ways we won’t even be able to fathom, until we’re behind them or in the midst of them and we look around and realize, “He’s doing it. What He always said He would do is happening, right in front of me.” And it’ll cause us to just revel and take delight in Him even more.

I can’t wait, I can’t wait, I can’t wait! Lord, Jesus, come have your way! Meet us in the middle of wherever we are and begin the dance that moves thousands, hundreds of thousands to you.

“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God.”

Galatians 2:20

#newreality

PRAY FOR HAITI

Home with the family...craziness. Also a time when I do a lot of reading! It's nice to be able to sleep in...well, I kind of sleep in except for Sarah coming in and first asking me to help her make breakfast and then bringing breakfast to me--and it was delicious!

Last night--well all yesterday I was praying for Haiti. I found an article which was telling of an incredible conference going on in Haiti today, put together in part by a woman named Joan Hunter. I really know nothing about this woman, but healing follows her. Haiti needs this healing. I was told (multiple times) that I have the gift of healing, not necessarily physical, but emotional and spiritual. Even before this was spoken over me, I was part of one girl being healed--physically and emotionally--really powerfully. (Weird, I hadn't remembered that until now) I wonder what will come of this woman and her ministry.

The real conference started today and about 1000 pastors are supposed to be coming. They'll be learning/being trained for two days and the third day (when we celebrate Jesus' resurrection!) they'll be praying for the people of the city--and more than 1 million are expected to show up!

All of this is being held in front of the presidential palace, where the three days of fasting and prayer were held in February a month after the earthquake. God is still moving and reaching out to this desperate country with open arms through His children. I am amazed and so enchanted with how God is moving and the good things He's doing and the fact that I get to watch and pray through it all. I am alive at a time when things are moving quickly, the Spirit is so active. I never ever imagined that I would be a part of anything like this. God is so much more than I can put into words!

And today we remember the day He endured more pain than we can imagine--all for the sake of love for us.

The love shown on the cross...confounds me and leaves me with no words. What do we say to love shown in this self sacrificial way, love which is so different from the self-gratifying love we see played out before us everyday. The love of the cross makes us pause and squint as we try to comprehend; or else captures us for only a moment before we move on, unsure of how to put into words what we just saw.

I feel that far too often we just walk away from the cross--because it really doesn't make sense to us. Those who choose to pick up their own cross and follow after Him are far and few between.

But through these few the love of God spreads through the world. I am so excited for Haiti today...on the day when He picked up His cross and walked to His death, they are learning the power of His name and how He can free people from all that has kept them chained. After all, Jesus didn't stay dead forever! That cross was for one day--but Jesus came back from that defeat, and He was stronger than ever! Too often we see Jesus as the one who made a way for us to have eternal life--and we forget that that eternal life starts now! We live abundantly (but not as the world sees abundance) from NOW until FOREVER. If Christians started grasping this now--and calling on the abundant life that He has to offer--no more sin controlling you, no more sickness keeping you from your dreams and no more shame keeping you from speaking His name--how powerful we would be! The Holy Spirit is real, He came first at Pentecost and He is moving through the whole earth even now. We are meant to live out this life by relying on the Holy Spirit for our whole strength--because He is connected to Jesus and God, our Father. We're not living this life out trying to do good works out of our own strength, but by asking God what He's up to in the world (getting to know Him intimately, so much so that His words--found in the Bible--are always buzzing through our brain and we know Him, and the truth He spoke, deeply) and then asking Him to move through us as we talk with people, pray for people and love. It's only His power, and His power flowing through us as we rely on and abide in Him, that will change the world. So don't look to yourself anymore! There is a higher power and His yoke is truly easy and light! Call on Jesus with all that you have within you and He will hear. He has just been waiting for you to give your full attention to Him, no more distractions or other's voices keeping you away. What this world needs is Jesus--and He's just waiting for them to cry out to Him.

Full of hope and joy because of Him and His goodness toward us and Haiti...

Haiti...stretching out their hands to Jesus

Haitians surprise me every time!

After I wrote the last post, I ran into some videos about Haiti and a three day fast that went on their recently...I love to hear them sing--that's how I remember them best, singing in church...so to hear a whole city singing was something else altogether for me. Literally everything stopped in that country for three days while they had a time of fasting and prayer. Unbelievable, especially since this is the time of year when they should be having Carnival (which is the original Mardi Gras). Instead, they were seeking God...

My soul is at rest in God. It feels so weird to not have turmoil, but so good. I am ina place where I just trust Him and I trust His plans and His love for me.

They need teachers in Haiti! Lord, send me!

Oh, but I have so far to go...I must learn how to teach in English first and learn Haitian Creole...but...it feels like I'm on my way somewhere, and that is so good.

A group from my school will be traveling to Haiti this spring break. I went to one of their team meetings and was so blessed to be around them, to see the faces of people who will go to the country I love...May your love be so deeply in them that the Haitian people (or anyone they encounter) will feel that love and be transformed by it. You at work through your people--and probably in ways they never expected...

We love You, Lord. We love the way You work.

Check out these videos: http://www.youtube.com/user/kgroder#p/u/4/7mEeGgQRta4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ChGU5LgTSU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Ex5UqAU33I

Okay and definitely watch the part in this video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdXqguIA5Z8

where the Haitian (pastor?) speaks...so good!!! To hear from their mouths what God is doing and how they are turning to Him...wow...now words--God is bringing His new birth for them!!!